Wednesday, July 20, 2011

Mediator Traits

When looking for a good mediator there are a few crucial matters to consider.  A mediator needs to have honesty, experience, familiarity with the subject matter, education, a likable demeanor, self-control, and perseverance.  Let's look at the "hows" and "whys" of each of these crucial mediator traits.

Honesty- Simply speaking a mediator needs to remain impartial to either party during the negotiations.  A talented mediator is also a talented negotiator.  In order to help both sides to compromise the mediator's job is to encourage everyone involved to give up some of there own demands.  It is important that a mediator keep the playing field even for both parties.  In other words, just because a mediator might be capable of successfully encouraging one party to give up on some of their demands, doesn't necessarily mean that is the best thing to do.  A good mediator needs to be honest with his/her clients and him/herself as to what really is a fair compromise.

Experience- As with all disciplines there is a lot of refinement and learning which comes with experience, and a mediator who has seen only a few meditations cannot be compared to one who has seen hundreds. 

Familiarity with the subject matter- Although a good mediator may be capable of successfully facilitating cooperation between two parties, even without being previously familiar with the subjects being discussed, having a strong background in the matters at hand does help.  When a mediator lacks that familiarity the parties themselves need to constantly bring the mediator up to speed with the issues at hand.  With that said, the less complicated the issues at hand the less this will be important.

Education- Before hiring a mediator find out how much education s/he has in mediation, and how much education s/he has in the subject matters that you need mediated.

A Likable Demeanor- The way that a mediator comes across to you is important.  S/he should be somebody which both parties feel that they can talk to and that they can work with.

Self-Control- The mediator should not get emotionally involved in the mediation procedure.  Okay, so let's be honest, if the mediator is a human being they will feel something about the case at hand, and deep-down-inside they may even want to side with one of the parties s/he feels sorry for them or feels a certain affinity towards them, or whatever.  So in spite of the mediator's inevitable feelings s/he must exhibit the self-control in order to remain impartial.

Perseverance- Let's face it, in cases where two parties have opposing self-interests and often emotionally charged histories, they will not always be to quick to make concessions.  The mediator needs to be capable of working through the stand-stills in order to help everyone to ultimately be happier.

This list of mediator traits should get you off to a good start on picking a subjectively, and objectively good mediator.

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